LOVEGIVER is the Italian Association for promoting Sexual Assistance for People with Disabilities. Founded in 2013 by a group of people headed by Max ULIVIERI promotes the right to health and psychological and sexual well-being through educational projects for operators and welfare professionals, families of people with disabilities and disabled people themselves. In 2014 contributed to the creation of a bill (1442) laid before the Parliament; established the National Observatory on Sexual Assistance directed by Prof. Fabrizio QUATTRINI and published a book ‘LoveAbility’ Erikcson editor. 2014 is the year in which it was launched and completed the selection of the first 30 Sexual Assistants, which will soon begin the first official Italian course. As a committee we struggle to Sexual Assistance profile is recognized as a profession and can operate without limits by the Italian laws.
The assistance to sexuality of people with disability represent a concept that include simultaneously “respect” and “education” and could represent the maximum expression of “the right to health and psycho-physical and sexual welfare” for a civilized country.
It is for this reason that speaking plainly of “sexual assistance” could result extremely reductive. Qualifying this conception through the terms of support to Emotionality, to Endearment, to Corporealness and to Sexuality better allow us to taste all the shades of emotion that the concept contains in itself.
Assistance to emotionality, to endearment, to corporealness and to sexuality is well defined by the free choice of human beings to live and share their own sexual-erotic experience not depending by the trials they face in their life experience.
The Sexual Assistant is a professional (man or woman) with homosexual, heterosexual or bisexual orientation with a full grow and “healthy” sexual and psycho-physical consciousness (from this descending the importance of an accurate selection of the candidates).
The Sexual Assistant, through his professionalism, support the differently abled people experimenting and exploring eros and sexuality. This operator, theoretically and psycho-physically trained on sexuality themes, helps and support people either with physical and/or psychical disability to live an erotic, sensual and/or sexual experience. The sessions are, actually, a continuum experience that starts from a basic massage or physical contact, passing through body/body contact, experimenting the contact and the sensorial experience, suggesting fundamentals tips for practise onanism, ending to direct stimulation and experimentation of sexual pleasure and climax experience.
This sort of operator, defined of “sexual welfare”, has therefore an adequate and qualifying preparation and will not focus exclusively on the “mechanic” process of sex. He/she will carefully promote sexual-affective education directing at best the energies trapped in the body of the disabled people.
One of the goal is to break down the cumbersome stereotype of the “asexuality” of people disabled or with some sort of difficulty, in some way considered unfit to experiment and practice their sexuality. It’s of primary importance overcome the notion of “angels gender”.
The Sexual Assistant, depending on his/her training, sensibility and availability could help to the re/discovery of three dimensions of sex education
- Ludic: self discovering of their body
- Relational: Discovery of other’s body
- Ethic: Corporeity worth discovery
and, at the same time, help the disabled persons being more responsible and protagonist of their sexual and/or affective relationship, fostering them to a greater ken and self-consciousness and a more adequate skill level of self-care either for body and person.
The lack of self-esteem is a restraint to a natural approach to the complementary gender. The Sexual Assistant can foster to accept and don’t restrain the various need of their body, of the senses and of the feelings.